Thursday, September 22, 2011


Alright, darlings.
I have decided to post a few recipes, even though they aren't entirely mine.
They're good, cheap and easy.
.....Like yer mom. HURNK!

Zucchini and Avocado Soup                                           

Get that crap!

2 tablespoons of olive oil
4 green onions, chopped       **(save out like 1/3)
                                   **Japan people (たまねぎ: 2 stalks)
1 teaspoon of grated fresh ginger        **(I used like 1,000)
1 garlic clove,  chopped
2   14 1/2 ounce can of vegetable broth + 1 cup water
       **Japan people (I used 2 of those
       bigger dry soup packets and adjusted the h2o slightly)
2 medium zucchini,  thinly sliced
1/2 teaspoon of salt                           **(disregard fascist recipe, season at will!)
1/4 teaspoon of freshly-ground black pepper        **(season away, you maniac, you!)
1 medium avocado, seeded, peeled, & chopped
1 tablespoon of lemon juice
1 tablespoon of chopped red bell pepper               **(dare I say, mmmmore?)

Cook that mess!

Heat oil in a large saucepan over medium heat. Add 2/3 of the green onions and cook 3 minutes; stir in ginger and garlic and cook, stirring, 1 minute more. Add broth, water, zucchini, salt, and pepper. Cover and cook 10 minutes, until zucchini is very soft. Cool slightly. Stir in avocado. Puree soup however you damn well can. Food processors or blenders are best.
          **(I have a hand mixer and I blended the bejeezus out of the soup while covering it with a lid
         and using my available elbow to shield my face from the scalding dish. This part was not a
         happy time for me.)
Return to pan to heat through. Stir in lemon juice. Garnish with red pepper and remaining green onions.

This recipe yields 4 servings.

Kabocha Soup                                                         

Get that crap!

1/2 Kabocha      **(this is a Japanese pumpkin... not sure
1/2 onion                 what the best alternative would be...)
1 cup milk         **(substitute a little bit with cream)
2 cubes chicken bouillon
2 1/3 cups water
1 tbsp butter
salt and pepper to season
                          **This recipe really needs a little more - I added;
            black pepper (to taste... I like mine real peppery)
            salt (to taste... a little less than the pepper)
            cinnamon (1/8 tsp... or so)
            vanilla (1/8 teaspoon... or so)
            chives (however much you like on top)

Cook that mess!

Slice onion thinly. Take out kabocha seeds and cut kabocha into large blocks.
            **(You can cook the seeds with butter, salt and a dash of maple syrup. omg.)
Place kabocha on a plate and microwave for 4 minutes. Take off skin and slice kabocha thinly. Saute onion slices with butter in a pan. Add kabocha slices in the pan and saute together. Add chicken bouillon and water. Simmer onion and kabocha until soften. Puree soup. Add milk. Heat the soup over low heat and season with salt, pepper, cinnamon and vanilla. After pouring a bowl, garnish with chives.


Oh my god. My mixer belongs in porn.

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